Some people have the natural ability to empathize and sympathize. Empathy opens my heart to feel the feelings of another. Sympathy opens my heart to feel them as if they were mine.
Mourning is a relationship of loss. When one is connected and then disconnects, there is a mourning, a grief. The loss of connection mourns. Sometimes we mourn for ourselves, sometimes for others.
A good friend passed into the next life prematurely. He was only 47 and full of vision. At the oddest times, I mourn his not being available to call and talk.
A congresswoman was shot and her friends murdered. There is a national mourning for someone we did not know. The grief is as much for our loss of safety as it is for the loss of these people we do not know. Compassion engages mourning.
Expressed compassion in mourning brings comfort. Talking to my friend's wife, I have compassion to spend time with his adult son. Why? I am mourning my friend. Maybe engaging some compassion with his son will bring comfort to both of his. His son misses his father. I miss his father. Together we can bring comfort to each other.
In our nation there will be need for comfort as we process these events. It will take people mourning together. They will need empathy and sympathy beyond what they have used before this time. Overall, we will see comfort as a nation.
Deeper wounds come out in mourning. Feelings we did not want to acknowledge or express can come forward. Some days before the Arizona murders and shooting of the congresswoman, a family friend made some comments in my home that greatly mourned me. He referred to the Oklahoma terrorism from many years back and bemoaned that it did not bring attention like it should have to issues. His mourning was either over or never happened. Comfort had never come to his soul. Anger seems to seethe beneath the surface and threaten others. Then that same anger surfaced with a gun in Arizona and killed.
There is a river of anger lurking in our nation and world. It never leaves. Mourning is a healing agent when applied with compassion given in empathy and sympathy. It brings out the wounds, cleanses them and comforts.
Talking with another friend she mentioned how her father would change a simple song to make it funny. Her father would have been someone I could enjoy and relate in life. He is gone from this side. I know him through her laugh. I know him through her joys and sometimes mourning moments. He comes through. She remembers and comfort becomes stronger every moment.
Back to my 47 year old friend. Conversing with another friend of the friend, she commented on how she appreciated the job I did praying at the funeral. It was a hard moment. It was real life. The church was packed with ministers who had been touched by this great man. Praying with a group of ministers could be intimidating. But, we were there to mourn and be comforted, so we just acted like ourselves and walked together in compassion to comfort.
Without the compassion added in the mourning our nation feels, we will not see comfort. Those who do not mourn may feel justification or anger or control or some other emotion that leads to destruction. Some other person will thrust out. Some other angst will reveal itself. The media is already full of it. One points at the other and accuses the other of pointing back. Each justifies their anger and angst. Some of that is part of the mourning. Some of that is a denial of compassion. Some of that is predecessor to the next event to mourn.
Father, will we bring comfort through mourning? Will we understand and engage into a brighter life? Will we handle moments of life with the tools provided in our souls for good?
Help us be like You.
In all the grief we bring to You, Your love continues to cover our mistakes. You process our grievances and continue to love and comfort us and those around us. You are the God of all comfort.
Cause your people to pray and find another solution to our angst. Help us process in mourning and find the place of comfort in place of conflict.
Let the joy of the morning facing the greatest graces of God that offer themselves new replace the angst of mourning disturbing our souls.
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